Widows, Jews and Judges
When you are left widowed, your friends change.
Partly, this is because some of your friends were mainly your spouses, but also I’m sure that some don’t like asking a single person to their parties. That’s hard but I can think of friends, who I’ve never seen since my wife died.
But three groups have virtually stuck to me through thick and thin in the last couple of years; widows, Jews and judges.
The dark sister and brotherhood of widows in understandable. Sometimes at one in the morning, you’ll get an e-mail from an insomniac widow, asking how you are. You might chat on MSN early in the morning, as it seems many can’t sleep. Strangely, that has never been one of my problems, and my sleep is usually only difficult, when I am trying to solve a programming or other problem. I have been very lucky with that.
I don’t have many Jews amongst my friends, and most of them don’t practice any more, but to a man and a woman they have stuck by me and have always been there with help and a chat. I think it’s because Jews don’t generally believe in an afterlife and helping others whilst you’re in this life is the most important thing. But what the reas0n is, I thank them all.
My wife was a barrister and amongst the lawyers the judges have kept in touch. I’ve had some great dinners over the last few months! Perhaps, it’s because they have a much better view of life than the rest of us.
That is not to say that my friends have been reduced to just these groups, but they stand out from the others, who on the whole just don’t seem to appreciate how lonely it can be to be without someone, you’ve lived with for forty years. Sadly, we failed to make the ruby wedding by just a few months.
So if you have a friend, who loses a partner, make sure that you don’t leave them out of your life. If there is one thing that is sure in life, it is that being a widow or widower is something that is likely to happen to you!
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The Anonymous Widower 
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