The Anonymous Widower

E-Mail Address List For Sale

I received a spam e-mail yesterday offering me a list of three billion e-mail addresses.  I suspect, I’m on it, as they say they used the list to spam me.

How do you get off a list like that?

The only way is to change your e-mail address! Not easy, if it’s a domain, you’ve spent a lot of money on!

But in my view, as probably selling the list is illegal in most civilised countries in the world, shouldn’t someone have the power to at least ban the domain they are using? That by the way is \\email\\million\\dot\\c\\o\\m. It is registered in Muscat.

July 1, 2010 Posted by AnonW | Computing | Internet, Spam | 2 Comments

I Get Bored With These

I just had this one.  Does the guy think I’m an idiot or something?

Dear Sir,

My name is Didier and i was the personal account manager to a national of your country who was involved in the ill fated Kenya Airways that crash in coast of Abidjan. He is a beneficiary to a deposit with our bank which is at a summary of US$15 million. As his account manager, hearing the report of his death.

I made enquiries to trace he’s extended family relatives to come forward to claim their inheritance but my efforts were aborted. It was during one of my research that i came across your email address and now decided to inform you of this information.

Since you bear the same surname with him i whish to appoint you as his next of kin, with this arrangement, the bank management will acknowledge you as his next of kin and will accept to release this money in your favor. I am giving you this classified information in order to connive with you to get the money out of my bank into your bank account as his next of kin, of which we shall be shared accordingly. If you are ready to cooperate with me on the claim of this fund, email me back with the following information:

• YOUR FULL NAME
• YOUR AGE
• MARITAIL STATUS
• ADDRESS
• PHONE NUMBER
• YOUR COUNTRY
• YOUR OCCUPATION

I will be most glad to hear from you.

Yours Sincerely,

Mr Didier.

I’m afraid Mr. Didier that I will not be contacting you.  However, I’ve reported this to a very nasty man in your country, with a very rather club and an Oxford English Dictionary.  The latter is to teach you to spell properly.

April 2, 2010 Posted by AnonW | Computing | Internet, Spam | Leave a comment

Spam Messages

This was the body of a spam e-mail I received.

Introduction The girl scout around a crane caricatures a flabby cloud formation. Another most difficult eggplant operates a small fruit stand with a carelessly polka-dotted deficit. If the mortician steals pencils from a bullfrog, then a fundraiser defined by the tomato ceases to exist. If a For example, a tornado about a tomato indicates that a cheese wheel about the wheelbarrow writes a love letter to a paper napkin. Some corporation over a tornado hesitantly is a big fan of another tomato from the freight train. A cargo bay is impromptu. A rude minivan rejoices, and the wheelbarrow caricatures a ball bearing. When the dust bunny living with a tornado is proverbial, some geosynchronous polar bear sanitizes the cab driver. Now and then, the globule gives a pink slip to the prime minister from a customer. The tape recorder aro faults with a soggy polygon. Introduction A buzzard recognizes a greedily rude crane. Most people believe that a lover about a satellite reaches an understanding with a diskette near the parking lot, but they need to remember how wisely the sandwich gets stinking drunk. When a pompous burglar returns home, an umbrella prays. nWUQPeBMQIZgCH[AXUThe formless void borrows money from a customer behind the stovepipe. A deficit derives r freight train laughs out loud, a demon earns frequent flier miles. A canyon around the grain of sand is hypnotic. Any grand piano can organize a crane, but it takes a real eggplant to seek the magnificent crane. When the turkey is frozen, a class action suit slyly figures out an apartment building. Indeed, the hockey player caricatures the tornado. When you see the canyon, it means that a crane beyond a formless void prays. Introduction When another mortician toward the blithe spirit is college-educated, a CEO inside the apartment building sanitizes the accidentally slow razor blade. A cocker spaniel is boiled. Sometimes a most difficult dolphin beams with joy, but a hydrogen atom always has a change of heart about the burglar! When a completely makeshift hydrogen atom leaves, a single-handledly load bearing recliner hides. carpet tack about a short order cook plans an escape from a gentle light bulb the cashier inside a dust bunny. The oil filter living with the skyscraper Indeed, the chestnut defined by some nation knowingly laughs and drinks all night with a turn signal living with some polar bear. A proverbial defendant is rude. The overripe cyprus mulch steals pencils from a stoic fruit cake. Any vacuum cleaner can negotiate a prenuptial agreement with a tripod related to a polygon, but it takes a real bottle of beer to accidentally share a shower with a vacuum cleaner over some cyprus mulch. An apartment building self-flagellates, and a completely tattered deficit takes a coffee break; however, a tripod over a pine cone buries the ostensibly twisted avocado pit. The feverishly loyal inferiority complex sells an eggplant inside the tuba player to the earring, but the customer somewhat finds lice on a cough syrup. When a hockey player for the roller coaster is cosmopolitan, another foreign reactor sanitizes the slyly dirt-encrusted briar patch. Furthermore, a nuclear cargo bay ruminates, and the Alaskan squid dances with the eggplant about a rattlesnake.

You could imagine Richard Burton or Eric Cantona reading it.  It would still not make sense, but it would have a certain lilt to it.

As a programmer though, you have to admire the man, who wrote the program that writes this rubbish.

February 13, 2010 Posted by AnonW | Computing | Internet, Spam | Leave a comment