The Anonymous Widower

Is This The World’s Most Annoying Christmas Present?

A guy on the radio, has just claimed he had a Match of the Day mug for Christmas.

That bit is fine.

But every time he picks it up to drink, the mug plays the theme tune.

Now that is a superb way to annoy someone!

December 27, 2013 Posted by | World | | Leave a comment

My Second Worst Christmas Ever!

This has been my second worst Christmas ever! Except for Christmas lunch with my son, his partner and a few friends, it has been an unmitigated disaster.

I’ve frozen stiff, as my house has fought back against the plumber, who has gamely tried to fix the killer central heating system.

One of my pleasures at Christmas is going to see Ipswich play and the fixture list and the trains conspired to make that impossible. My attempts at finding a lift were a futile waste of time. I think, I should have developed a Plan B, where I skipped Christmas lunch and found a good hotel near Doncaster, from where I could have got a taxi to the match.  But then knowing my luck, it would have been flooded out.

Incidentally, I’ve not bought my ticket for the trains to Bournemouth for Sunday, as the day I do, something will come about to stop that!

Next Christmas, I won’t be here at Christmas! Perhaps, I’ll just hit a policeman on Christmas Eve, so I’m inside for a day or so. At least, I’d have some new friends to talk to.

On the other hand there must be hotels that specialise in miserable Christmases. I could always try a cruise, as from past experience, I know they’re pretty grim.

My worst Christmas wasn’t 2007 when C died just before. I helped out at the Old Peoples’ Christmas Lunch and I seem to remember there was plenty of football to watch amongst friends.

The worst one had actually been a few years before, when our eldest son and his wife, went off skiing and left C and myself to look after about a dozen horses.  And it snowed! I’m not in contact with them any more, as she feels that husbands should have no contact with their former families. That was a Christmas to truly forget.  But as we did, C and myself, laughed it off. I do hope my son and his wife are flooded out this Christmas and have their worst Christmas ever. I know that’s uncharitable, but they deserve nothing better.

December 27, 2013 Posted by | Sport, Transport | , , | 4 Comments

Getting Back To Normal

After yesterday’s disaster on getting to Doncaster, which was compounded by Ipswich playing extremely well and winning three-nil, things seem to be getting back to normal.

They are dual-handed on BBC Breakfast with Naga Munchetty and Jon Kay.

Even our cricketers are doing better!

But I’ve still got a long list of things to sort out.

My e-mail and e-commerce computer has a missing R on the keyboard.  I think a USB keyboard and mouse will solve that one.

I’m typing this on my other computer, which I hate because it’s Windows 7 and Office 2010, which is just another case of fiddling and is far inferior for my purposes to Vista and Office 2007. I also hate the keyboard on this computer, as the Delete key is in the wrong place amongst many design faults. Can’t they leave well enough alone. All PCs and laptops must have the same keyboard!  It should be the law!

I’m also virtually typing in the dark, as I have this computer at the other end of the table, and Jerry’s lights are crap. I need to grow another pair of hands, so I can put the Anglepoise up at this end of the table. When I first saw this house, I said that the lights must be replaced, but short of tearing down the ceiling, no-one seems to have any idea on how to do it. Obviously, Jerry used to walk around with a miner’s helmet on.

I must hope that the plumber can get over to fix my heating system.  It’s just nineteen in here.

The humidity is up to forty six, which is better, but that is due to my little humidifier, I bought at John Lewis.  The humidifier, I hired at great expense has failed.

One of the weird things about this house is that small electrical things fail. One of my Nokia 6310i’s needed repair and the menders thought I’d dropped it in water.  I hadn’t.  The latest casualty is an expensive mouse, which seems to have given up the ghost.  It wouldn’t even let me change the battery, as it seemed to have glued itself solid. So I’m using an old fashioned USB mouse shared between my two computers.  And both have their USB ports on the left, which means the cable runs in front of me and constantly gets tangled up in my dressing gown.

Life could be worse!

December 27, 2013 Posted by | World | , | 7 Comments