The Anonymous Widower

Surrogate Mothers

The Times magazine had a large article about gay parents, who use surrogate mothers to give birth to their children.

As a father I can understand the mentality of those who want to be the mother or father of a child, but I’ve always found it difficult to comprehend the mind of the women who carry the baby. All of the mothers, I’ve known would be unlikely to go through all the problems and pain of childbirth and then give the baby away.

March 2, 2013 Posted by | World | , | Leave a comment

A Problem With Not Recognising Gay Marriage

When some countries recognise gay marriage and others don’t you are going to get a few problems.

This story from the United States, illustrates one small but sometimes expensive problem well.

Edith Windsor was legally married to her gay partner in Canada, five years ago. Her partner has since died and because she now lives in New York, she will have to pay $600,000 in what in the UK would be death duties. If her partner had been a man, she wouldn’t have to pay the tax.

So now the case has ended up at the United States Supreme Court.

I’m not a lawyer and I’ve no idea what would happen in the UK.

But surely in this age, we should clear everything up to make it all clear to everybody.

December 16, 2012 Posted by | News, World | , , | Leave a comment

Are Those Opposed To Gay Marriage Bigots?

Nick Clegg has got into hot water over the draft of his speech saying those opposed to gay marriage are bigots.

I must admit, that the only people I’ve ever heard, who are against gay marriage, and there haven’t been many, have been opposed to homosexuality as well.

I get a lot of evangelicals knocking at my door trying to convert me and I asked one, what their views on gay people was.  They were told politely to Foxtrot Oscar, after I heard their views.

The other thing that annoys them, is when I say my God is female. But it has the right effect and they move on.

September 12, 2012 Posted by | World | , , , | 7 Comments

Codebreaker At The Science Museum

This morning, I went to see the exhibition about Alan Turing called Codebreaker at the Science Museum.

Posters for Codebreaker

it is actually only a small exhibition, but with good quality and some unusual exhibits, including a differential analyser built out of Meccano.

There was also some exhibits and documents on Turing’s personal life, including the Coroner’s report on his suicide.

The exhibition says that his mother thought his death may not have been suicide and in his Wikipedia entry, this is said.

Turing’s mother argued strenuously that the ingestion was accidental, caused by her son’s careless storage of laboratory chemicals. Biographer Andrew Hodges suggests that Turing may have killed himself in an ambiguous way quite deliberately, to give his mother some plausible deniability. Hodges and David Leavitt have suggested that Turing was re-enacting a scene from the 1937 film Snow White, his favourite fairy tale, both noting that (in Leavitt’s words) he took “an especially keen pleasure in the scene where the Wicked Queen immerses her apple in the poisonous brew.”

If you look at others like Turing, such as Newton, you find characters very much on the edge. I used to work with a programmer, who always sang and made strange noises as he coded.  He argued that programming was such a logical business, you had to do something mad to balance the mind. Turing wasn’t a programmer in the sense we think now, but he was someone steeped in logic and I suspect the same applied to him.

Sadly, in today’s world, Turing would probably be treasured in much the way Stephen Hawking is.

At least now, hopefully his sexuality would not have been the problem it was in the 1960s.

June 22, 2012 Posted by | Computing, News | , , , , | 2 Comments

Germany versus Portugal

I’ve watched most of this match now and there has been a lot of tackling, that would get yellow cards in matches in the UK, but not too many seem to have been issued.

I’d not heard of the German striker who scored, Mario Gomez before, but he seems to have sensible views on gay footballers and urges them to come out.  After reading something in The Times last week, I would suggest that Ukraine is not the place. He talked about his views in the Guardian here. I hope it doesn’t have any consequences in this tournament.

June 9, 2012 Posted by | Sport | , , , | Leave a comment

Transport for London Bans Gay Cure Bus Adverts

I put up an article a couple of weeks ago about Stonewall’s adverts on London buses.

I thought there would be some protests and after watching them for nearly three weeks, I haven’t even seen one that has been damaged.

I usually read the Evening Standard and listen to the local news and have seen no reports of any protest either.

But now some gay cure adverts planned by an opposing Christian group, have been banned by Transport for London, as reported here.

I have read about the therapy they are promoting  in serious newspapers and magazines and it is not something I believe will work.  Therapy, such as that for smoking and nail-biting does work, but only because  the person seriously wants to give up. So on the same basis if a person seriously wanted to stop being gay, some simple less agressive therapy might help. There is a serious article in the Guardian, that anybody who believes religious-based methods cure people from being gay should read.

But my biggest issue with the adverts, is that they mimic the ones from Stonewall.

Surely this is an infringement of copyright!

Just imagine the row if Pepsi-Cola copied an advert from Coca-Cola.

April 13, 2012 Posted by | Transport | , , , | 4 Comments

Mice in Tesco Was Plague From God

This article in the Standard, entitled,  Mice plague ‘God’s reply’ to gay gift, is about a religious zealot, who claims that God got back at Tesco because they backed London’s Gay Pride march.

How ridiculous! Did God ring him up and tell him? Or does God have a Facebook or Twitter account?

Has anybody asked God, if he or she is gay and got an answer that can be proven?  After all, if there is only one God, they could be gay, straight or bi-sexual and probably wouldn’t know.  But if they are the only one, they are definitely lonely.

April 5, 2012 Posted by | News | , , , | 6 Comments

A Practical Reason for Same-Sex Marriage

There has been so much rheotic and I suspect rhubarb and prejudice talked about this, that it’s difficult to sort the wood from the trees.

But a spokesman on the BBC, who said he’s been in a good civil partnership for six years, said that the reason he wants to get married is for next-of-kin reasons. In the UK you can name who you want as a next-of-kin within reason, but he said that law stopped at Dover. So marriage would sort out quite a few problems, especially if your partner was unlucky enougfh to die.

He may be being a bit simplistic and it might be valid in countries like the Netherlands, Canada, Norway and South Africa, where same-sex partnerships or marriages are allowed, but what about countries like  Qatar or Saudi Arabia. On the other hand would British law take precedence?

March 15, 2012 Posted by | World | , | Leave a comment

Is This a Solution to Bigots Like Abu Qatada?

Michael Burleigh writing in the Sunday Times today, takes a broad look at terrorists who have come to or are in the UK.

He makes one point that I wholly sympathise with.  If someone says lets kill all people with a penchant for wearing purple socks, then they should be prosecuted for incitement to murder.

So why hasn’t Abu Qatada been prosecuted, if as some allege he has incited others for murder? Surely if found guilty and sentenced, he could then be returned to his homeland. We now have a precedent in that in this case in Derby, three men were jailed for urging people to hang homosexuals.

These cases would be very much helped if phone-tap evidence were allowed. I can never understand why it isn’t After all, if the United States can use it, to convict the Mafia, why can’t we use it with possible mass murderers. It might have the side-effect that they all got paranoid about talking to each other.

February 19, 2012 Posted by | News | , , , , | Leave a comment

Gay Footballers

There are no openly gay footballers in the UK, although there are others in countries such as Sweden and the United States.

It is relevant to look at the history of black footballers to get a handkle on how gay footballers will appear in the UK.

Viv Anderson was the first black footballer to play for England and he burst on the scene in the mid-seventies with Nottingham Forest.  His rise had a lot to do with Brian Clough, who I suspect didn’t give a care about anything other than your ability to play football.  And Anderson could certainly play!

At the time Anderson made his mark, Other black players also made the breakthrough.  Notably, this was the three players Cyrille Regis, Brendan Batson and Laurie Cunningham at West Brom. But now black players are commonplace and we’re even seeing the sons of black players entering the game and being successful.

I first saw black players in the early 1960s.  There weren’t many and they did get abuse. The most notable was Albert Johanneson, who played for Leeds.

It has been a long journey from the 1950s and 60s to where we are today.  And I don’t think that there are many, except those on the Far Right, who regret it.

It will be a long time before gay footballers are in the same high position. Judging by the time scale it took for black players to be fully successful and accepted, it will probably be somewhere between ten and twenty years.

One of the differences between black and gay players, is that although black players are obvious, gay ones are not. So how many are there out there at the moment.

There are probably more than you think!

I don’t have any evidence, but news stories over the years have constantly found quite a few gay policemen.  In fact, in one case, the Chief Constable of Sussex police made an appeal for gay officers, to help solve a homophobic murder and was totally surprised at the response he got.

So I wouldn’t be surprised if there are quite a few gay footballers. I suspect too, that many of their team-mates know the truth and keep the secrets of the dressing room. After all, all footballers know how their eccentricities or problems are reported in the tabloid press.

Some months ago, I wrote this.

I was at the Ipswich Inter Milan match in the San Siro, when I found myself sitting next to a journalist, who worked for one of the more outrageous tabloids. We chatted about various topics concerning football and Ipswich in particular and I can’t remember how it came up, but we started discussing my coeliac disease.  I then said that the statistics indicated that there must be at least one footballer, who must be a coeliac. I suggested it might make a story, as it might help those with the disease. He then said that the readers of his rag wouldn’t be interested.  But if I knew a footballer who was gay, then that would be a very valuable story.

THe full post is here. The last bit may well be the key. Despite what is generally thought, there have been a large number of intelligent and very savvy footballers. I always note Derek Dougan,  who was not considered very bright by the press to be very bright in his early years, but went on to be an author and a very good chairman of the Professional Footballers Association. So I do not think it unlikely, that one of the current crop of footballers, who is coming to the end of a good career, who just happens to be gay, will come out.  I suspect too, that he won’t sell his story to the tabloids.  After all with the coming out of Gareth Thomas, they can now see that the support from most people and the media is very strong.

This article in Wikipedia, discusses the issue of gay footballers and is well worth reading.

So I agree with a survey from the University of Staffordshire, that found that 90% of football supporters expect there to be an openly-gay footballer by 2015.

If you look at the dynamics of the long road to success of black footballers, I would actually think that 2015, might even be a bit pessimistic.

But just as this process is happening in the UK, it is also happening across the world. So I suspect that by the time of the 2022 World Cup in Qatar, one of the major football nations will have an openly gay footballer in the team. As homosexuality is illegal in that enlightened country, let’s hope that it has the right effect on the Qataris’ attitudes.

But then I live in hope that FIFA will see sense and realise that they are risking players lives and health by playing in the summer in the desert.

November 23, 2011 Posted by | Sport | , , , , | Leave a comment